Peter Coates
1 min readJul 23, 2024

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As an old guy, I find the premise misguided. Any kind of maximum-attractiveness score profoundly misses the point. Who cares if you're relatively attractive to many women? What matters is being highly attractive to the woman who is best suited to you. The other bazillion women in the world are irrelevant, and in fact, get in the way. The handsome chad who has unlimited options is actually more likely to miss the optimum match than a man of ordinary appearance who is confident in who he is. To get the girl who is right for you, what matters most is that there be a "you" for her to be attracted to. Yes, you have to present yourself well, and have social skills, etc., but what matters more is being highly differentiated from the crowd by being vividly yourself. Most of the other stuff follows more or less automatically, if you're all about being who you are, and not trying to follow artificial standards of slickness and attractiveness. The one thing most women actually find unattractive in men is the quality of being undercooked, only at home with video games, Star Wars, and online culture. All of that stuff is the opposite of being you.

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Peter Coates
Peter Coates

Written by Peter Coates

I was an artist until my thirties when I discovered computers and jumped ship for a few decades. Now I'm back to it. You can probably find some on instagram.

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